Monday, June 13, 2011

Therapy decision

I've been bandying about the decision on whether or not to go back into therapy.  I've decided that this is not the time.  I think it would be another attempt by me to get someone else to fix me.  What I need to do before going back is start practicing mindfulness, start working on changing my negative thought patterns and generally to start trying to put into practice the things I have already learned.

Seeing another therapist, reading another book, collecting articles off the internet will not accomplish anything until I make a commitment to do everything I can to help myself.  I'm sure we are all pretty aware of what those things are, but reading about a thing and actually thinking about how it applies to me and actually doing stuff is where I have to start.  Once I develop some better habits I will reconsider therapy.

I am fully aware that I have made the declaration to "Change my life, exercise everyday, meditate, eat better, blah, blah, blah" many, many times and I'm not so naive as to think this time will be any different but if I don't keep trying nothing will happen.  I will try not to put any pressure on myself and just focus on the fact that I'm doing the best I can.  Until I make some changes to my negative thought processes, I really don't think therapy is going to teach me anything new.

I could use a little help here.  Do you think this is a better approach? Or do you think a therapist can help me make those changes now even if they couldn't before?  Anyone returned to therapy after a lengthy absence and found it to be different.

Look at me, I said at the top of this post that I made up my mind and now, minutes later, I'm second guessing myself.  The story of my life - should I, shouldn't?


  1. I like that you think about if it is the best thing to do right now, rather than blindly following along seeing therapy as a cure.
    Personally, I think it boils down to whether or not you can afford a good therapist and then whether or not you can find a good therapist. For me, I've found two. The first had a doctorate, which I think extremely important. Psychologists are an entire different breed from the Master's level therapist. The second guy I saw had a Master's and essentially we became good friends and he gave me some inspiration and validated me, but was no help with my psych issues. The first, I left because I got too scared of facing things. I've seen roughly 15-20 different therapists over the years and they were all a waste of time except for the two I just mentioned. I think it is a lot of luck on finding a good therapist, a good match.
    If I had the money to spare, I would try finding someone again. Personally, I've gained so much from my blog writing and reading and it is all free.
    Oh, one caveat, if you are in danger of self-harm or suicidal, I would find someone immediately.

  2. I have only seen two briefly, I think friends are better even if blog friends. Like lady above only if you are suicidal would I see therapy however I would stay on antidepressant and not come off cold turkey but of course, just my degrees here. Have a good day! Hugs, Kim

  3. You have to do what you think is best for you! If you think that approach is going to work- go for it! :) You know what will be best, and if you don't find it working like you'd like it to, you can always go back to therapy!

  4. What Dylan said... you can change it. Whatever you decide, you're not locked in. Free to do what works on any given day.

    I think there's a lot to be said for self-analysis, and for trusting your feelings, too.

    I have considered therapy, but I can't imagine being able to sit in a room with someone who doesn't love me, understand me, know me at all and pour out my heart.

    I can't be that honest with someone I don't have a years-long relationship with.

  5. You do what you think is best for you--if that is trying to work it out for yourself or going back to therapy. I would only suggest that you truly ask yourself why you came to whatever decision you make.

    Personally, I've known that I needed to go back to therapy for a couple of years now, but financially couldn't make it happen. I find it refreshing to be completely honest with someone that not only has an outside perspective, but that I don't have to worry about censoring myself to avoid hurting someone close to me.

    Best Wishes to you with whatever you decide.

  6. Thank you all for your comments. It's so nice to have people who get it offer their two cents. I guess I didn't sound as sure as I thought and I find myself on the fence again because I don't know if I can do it on my own. Right at this moment I don't even know what "it" is. Your opinions really do help though.