Sunday, August 14, 2011

Sooo Tired

The fatigue and lack of energy is killing me.  Now I'm annoyed that I didn't insist on seeing Dr. F sooner I should try tomorrow to get an appointment sooner but I can't deal with the trolls.  I'm sleeping like crap.  I was supposed to spend yesterday with my sister (the one who lives in town - P) but I'm just too tired to move.  I spent the day watching t.v. and still I'm tired, I didn't even walk the dog, John did (have I said lately that I love my husband).  I did tidy the spare room (again) and told the kids this time that if I get stuck cleaning their mess, I will indeed put a door on that room and it will become my craft room.   They may think this is an empty threat but I'm not doing empty threats anymore.  I'm done.
Today I feel like I lost a boxing match in my sleep.  Headache, backache, stiff muscles and so tired.  Both sleepy tired and weak all over tired.  I hate this feeling because it doesn't even seem to matter how much I do sleep even after a nap I feel ready for sleep.  John has told me before "the less you do, the less you want to do" and I know he's right because I've been in that boat but that's not what this is.  There are plenty of things I want to do and it's not even that I don't "feel" like doing them, my body just feels so heavy and stiff.  I'm not sure if this is a physical thing because of the depression or if I'm coming down with something (have been coming down with it off and on for months now) or if there is something else wrong with me.  I just had a B12 shot this week so that's not it either. My mood is not bad. I think I'm just too tired to have any mood at all - good or bad.  I fear that if this fatigue doesn't lift soon my mood will take a nose dive.   This is awful to say but a serious physical illness doesn't seem like such a bad thing from where I'm sitting.  A real diagnosis that is treatable (or not) and a real reason for someone to take care of me so I don't have to feel guilty.  Perhaps even the long, empty, still sleep of the dead.  I know I should be grateful to be alive but at the moment...I just don't.  Perhaps my mood is not so great.  I know I get weepy and discouraged when I'm tired anyway but well sorry for whining.  I gotta believe tomorrow will be better.


  1. I've wished I had a physical disease before also, and of course there is always death to hope for, but not really. When you're depressed doing anything at all is so hard. I agree with John though.

    About a year ago I was doing the same thing with the sleeping and my doctor gave me UltraMeal, Magnesium, and B vitamins and within 3 or 4 days it was like I was on speed. I was also drinking a lot at the time and I think my body got depleted of nutrients. Just saying it's not always only depression.

  2. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. Hugs, Kim

  3. Hi Linda; What is "UltraMeal" exactly? I googled an there are quite a few different kinds. I'm willing to try anything at this point. I'm already on a multi-B vitamin and I have magnesium but haven't been taking it because I'm not supposed to take it with medication. I will find a good time to take it now.
    You agree with John about the "less you do" thing, me too. There are lots of times I feel like I;m being lazy or I'm just bored but I swear this is really different. Forced myself out for a half hour with the dog, meditated and now checking out things on line. I'm determined that today will be different but my body is protesting.

    Thanks Kim.

  4. I wonder why you're not supposed to take Mg with meds. I do.
    UltraMeal is made by Metagenics and it used to be you had to get it by prescription. It was prescribed mostly for cardiac and metabolic problems I think. I just saw they are making bars now, and I think I'll give them a try. The stuff is pricey so I only take half the dose, or one scoop instead of two.

    I think this is the only online site carrying Metagenics. Regardless, PureFormulas is the greatest with regard to customer service and the products they sell. You don't pay postage and I use standard shipping. My last order, I placed on Friday and I had it Monday.
    Yes, I should work for them.

    All my life I've been through stuff like you're describing. When I was in relationships I used to get sick like with the flu and actually run a fever. The only thing they could find wrong with me is I was suffering from malnutrition. I think the stress ate up my nutrients. Since I've been out of relationships, I seldom get sick. But, that's just me. I think it was all stress.

  5. Know those feelings. The whole fatigue thing is killer and it's difficult to suggest things without sounding like i don't understand... but please know that I do understand and I'm only sharing from my own experiences. Nothing works all of the time for me.

    For about two months now I've taken a good quality multi-vitamin, and omega 3 supplements daily. I eat a good breakfast lots of fibre), try and limit the sugar highs get plenty of iron from spinach and kale, I'm trying to cut down on sluggish dairy and curb my coffee intake. Oh, and a better balance of carbs and protein at meals. Who can say if that is why I have more energy now. I seem to be cycling between an active and a tired day.

    Also worth getting a full panel of blood test incase there is something else at play. I'm still learning about the diet side of things.

    Music sometimes suprises me into action, stimulates the brain. The surgery i go to have a really good playlist so i tend to go for a consultation more upbeat than when i arrived!

    I don't know Jo, let me know if you hit on anything that works for you.